25 | Getting Used To Uncomfortability
and that it is okay to hate certain things or people
You are allowed to hate certain things
We are all humans, and it is human nature to dislike/hate certain things, activities or even people. I don’t believe when people spread the notion of we shouldn’t hate anything in this world, and that we should always be positive about everything and that we should always resolve the hate we have for something or someone; I think it is perfectly okay to hate something or some people WITH THE DISCLAIMER that it isn’t affecting your daily life, causing you so much anger or distress or causes disruption in your activities because it is bothering you so much or constantly on your mind. If you hate something but can go about your daily life unbothered or unaffected, then I think it is okay. So yeah, it’s as simple as that and that is the introduction to this weeks newsletter.
*Can I just point out that I am not advocating or promoting hate towards anyone. It is completely up to you to decide whether you hate someone or not. All I’m saying is, if you think you have the right reason/s to hate someone and you do not want to change that hate, then that is okay too. I will also try to convey that I do not think that hate is okay if it causes you stress, anger, disrupts your life, is constantly on your mind etc etc*
The beauty of this world
Is that sometimes you can choose to never cross paths with the thing you hate. If you hate the smell of doughnuts, you just make sure to never go into a doughnut shop etc etc. If you hate the taste of fish, you just make sure you never eat fish. If you hate a certain someone due to something that happened or whatever the reason may be, you just don’t interact with them.
Your choice
It is all your choice really. You choose to keep hating these things and want to avoid them as much as you can? then by all means go for it.
If you decide you are sick of hating something or are sick of being afraid of something (which is the source of the hate) or you just don’t want to live your life hating that activity or thing, then you can choose to overcome that hate.
Sometimes, however, you do not have such a choice. That is when the thing you hate is a crucial part of your job or your daily life. If you hate the smell of petrol, but you drive a car, you have to just either get used to it, or you could make the choice of I don’t know doing whatever you can to avoid the smell. Nose clippers or maybe even get an electric car. If you hate driving long distances, but it’s cheaper for you to live far from your workplace and it is financially better for you, you just have to get used to it.
Certain things I hate
I hate deep water. I hate the ocean. Don’t get me wrong. I love the smell of the ocean, I love sitting by the ocean and the breeze and that feeling of tranquillity right around sunset with a cold drink in your hand. Amazing. What I hate and fear is that feeling of being in deep water. I don’t feel the need to conquer that fear or I don’t mind staying with that hate. I just do what I can to avoid deep water. I still go on boats and I am not afraid of being on a ship. I just wouldn’t jump off the ship with my friends to swim or snorkel. In the future would that change? possibly. But this is just an example of something that I hate and at the moment, I don’t feel the need to change that feeling.
Photo by Joseph Barrientos on Unsplash I hate meeting new people. This is a very weird sentence to say but let me explain myself. I hate that feeling of meeting new people because It can be filled with nerves and anxiety, however, once I do meet the people and they turn out to be amazing, I am calm and I am glad I spoke to them or met them. The thing is, for me, It is slightly a crucial part of my day to day life to communicate with people, especially new people. In medicine and in the hobbies I enjoy such as youtube, without making new connections, I would not grow. Therefore, even though I hate it. I have to continue to do it. I still get uncomfortable and I hate meeting new people, but I know I have to do it and I am okay with that. + the feeling of making new friends or acquaintances and the laughs and jokes and the good feelings that come with it are all the good parts and I enjoy those feelings.
I hate zoom calls. I hate it. I don’t know why, but I just get uncomfortable. However, surprise surprise, because of the pandemic it has become the centre of communication. I offer to tutor and it’s all through zoom and I had to get used to that feeling of hate / uncomfortability. I work with different teams now on different platforms and we meet through zoom so again, that is another reason to get used to that feeling of uncomfortability. Even without the pandemic, with my youtube channel, zoom calls would be crucial as we cannot always meet people face to face due to busy schedules.
Photo by Charles Deluvio on Unsplash
Summary:
It’s okay to hate things. It’s okay to not want to conquer that fear. However, sometimes the thing you hate or the thing that makes you uncomfortable is either part of your job, your daily life activity or even your passive income. Therefore, you just have to get used to it. Get used to it and move on with your daily life, or try and actively do something to get over that fear/hate/uncomfortably.
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